Fire of Anger

It had been a series of recent events that led me to be aware of my imperfection.

Stressed by existing load of work and frustrated over the quality of services and support provided by counterparts, I too flared up and lost my patience. Now, I understand the sayings that the "the fire of anger can burn away the forest of merit". I think being in the project over the past few months, the harsh tone that I started to pick up would have created enough negative karmic links to burn away my whatever minor pool of merits if any.:-((

By having to display anger to get things done over a series of dissatisfactory events had caused me to unmindfully develop the habit of not controlling my anger and words, and quick earning a new reputation as a quick-tempered person.

As I start to become aware that it is not right way in the long run and wondering how to handle it, the weekly Dharma class again offers wise advice.

Venerable touched on the cause of emotions:

6 senses bases --> contact --> feeling --> craving

Desire arises from thinking. We think because we have perception.
Perception recognizes things as the 6 senses come into contact with external world.
Feeling is an aggregate with no karma. Feeling can be pleasant or unpleasant or no pleasant or unpleasant.
With Mental formation of anger or unhappiness then karma arises.
Being uninstructed, we react to situation via our senses.

Why do I get angry?
I had developed an expectation level on how things should be done developed from past similar project handling experience. And when one has a basis to compare past & now and when the present did not meet the expectation formed, together with additional time and effort required that added further to existing stressful workload, that resulted in anger being developed. In comparison, one without the previous experience could accept the current situation better without comparison.

The Buddha sees and He knows but He does not react with feeling.
There is perception but craving does not arise. Why not affected by perception?
He is completely eradicated of all underlying tendency.

Sigh, actually the Counterparts also have to cope with normal operations on top of handling the projects just like us and they too do not have the resources hence keep pushing the responsibilty to us. Hence, Whose fault? Maybe the management for not willing to employ more resources? Why do I have to take on so personally on the project? Too much "I" involved...

Only the weekly Dharma classes always have some wise tips to offer to cool me down and remind me on practice.
Amituofo, May I develop more wisdom & compassion in handling life. Amituofo...


(Pardon is sought for any misinterpretation/misunderstanding of Teachings)